The Wedding Ring

Sharing your story is activism. I'm making it easier for you to tell your (anonymous or public) story by sharing my blog with you. Message me or tag someone who has a story the world needs to hear. There's no deadline. Just know this offer is always there. Thank you to my friend Marina Terteryan for sharing her story. 

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  • I wear her wedding ring every day.
  • In a moment of lucidity two years ago, she slipped it on my finger one day and asked me to keep it safe after she was gone.
  • “You’ve got to plan these things in advance, you know. Age doesn’t ask - it just takes.”
  • Then, she immediately forgot what had happened and asked me for the fifth time where we are right now. We were at her home.
  • I wear her wedding ring every day because it represents love.
  • The love she had for her late husband, a tall man with a jolly laugh, who never ran out of jokes to tell.
  • The love she had for her mother who suddenly died when she was 7 from a perfectly curable disease, if only they had the means back in Soviet Armenia.
  • The love she had for her father, who shot off his own finger so he could be dismissed early from WWII and come back to his kids.
  • The love she had for her daughters, which she never learned how to express because she didn’t have her own mother long enough to learn from.
  • The love she has for her brothers, whose photos she talks to because she thinks they are video chatting when we show her photos on a smartphone.
  • The love she has for my brother and me, which she communicates through kissing our hands and holding them up to her face.
  • I wear her wedding ring every day because she has lost everything several times.
  • Once when she moved from the village to the city, taking nothing with her.
  • Again when her house was robbed in her 20s, as the family was sleeping.
  • Again when she moved to the US with only one suitcase of clothes.
  • And again when we moved multiple times throughout LA as my family was trying to “make it” in America.
  • It is the only object she has kept since the day she received it.
  • I wear her wedding ring every day on my ugly hand.
  • The left one, where I have to cut my nails all the way down so I can play the violin.
  • It makes me feel graceful as I play.
  • And when I feel graceful as I play, I remember how to be graceful as I live.
  • I wear her wedding ring every day because I will remember her life, even when she can't.
  • “Why did you put this pointy hat on me?”
  • “It’s your birthday today, Grandma.”
  • “Oh. Ok. Is that a wedding ring on your hand? Did you marry that guy?”
  • “No, Grandma. It’s your ring. You asked me to keep it safe.”
  • “Oh. That’s probably a good idea. I’d lose my own ass if it wasn’t attached to me.”
  • She pauses.
  • “Don’t wear it on your wedding finger.”
  • “Why?”
  • “Men will assume you are married and stay away from you, and then your eggs will rot.”
  • “Hah ok, Grandma.”
  • “Hey Ang - Sak - Flor - oh right - Mar. Why did you put this ugly hat on me?”
  • “It’s your birthday today, Grandma.”
  • “It is?”
  • “Yes.”
  • “How old am I?”
  • “84.”
  • “Well shit. That’s pretty old.”
  • Pause.
  • “Hey, why am I wearing this weird hat?”
  • Sigh.
  • “Because today is a special day, Grandma.”
  • “It’s special because you’re here,” she says as she kisses the back of my left hand and hugs it to her face.
  • Happy birthday, Grandma.
Marina_Grandma

You can read other stories here and here. Remember, sharing your story is activism.

 

Lauren Currie1 Comment